I love him very much, but I know that he NEVER EVER are going to change because he is a NARCISSIST. I can tell you that I have been in this situation since 2014. Is there even a way for me to help him he’ll or is it something he has to do on his own?ĭear Katrina! You asked ” How long does one wait for someone to grow and heal Before I leave or after I came back ? My boyfriend say EXCATLY the same thing that your bf, he is gonna change…but that only last a couple of weeks. His EX’s World lot of makeup, wear skimpy clothing, went to parties, and two of the three cheated on him.
also, how do you help someone you care about get out of his past? Although he denies it, I feel like when he comes at me like that he’s coming at his past, everything that he had an issue with was from his past relationships. I guess my question is how long does one wait for someone to grow and heal before coming back to them to try again. I was thinking about telling him how I feel before I left, but I’m not sure whether I should do that before I leave or after I come back. I’m deploying in June for 9 to 12 months. But despite all of this I know that he’s a really good guy and I still really want to be with him. I also think that it’s in a maturity issue. I’m starting to think that he wasn’t ready to date when he met me but wasn’t willing to pass up the opportunity to be with me. He told me that I was just giving up on him, and that I don’t really care about him. I explained why I’m breaking up and I told him everything that had been bothering me that I told him about. But it started feeling like I was his crutch and that he expected me to make him happy.
I know that he’s very depressed in the place that he works and I understand that it’s his first time away from home and I’m far away, but I have spent nearly all of my time attending to him making sure that he knows that I love him and then I’m loyal to him. I realized recently that this controlling is because he doesn’t trust me. At the end of these arguments he usually apologizes and says that he’s going to change, but it only lasts for about a week. He would also get upset if I said I had a problem with something he said, instead of addressing the problem he would just get either mad or sad, saying that he’s just a bad boyfriend and he’s a piece of trash and that he doesn’t deserve me. We get into these fights because he would get upset at me hanging out with a guy friend or he would accuse me of not being where I say I am. I’ve tried introducing him to my guy friends over Skype and getting him to talk with them so he knows them a little. He’s also would get mad at me if I didn’t text him back quickly enough. He doesn’t like me looking sexy saying that the only time I should be wearing anything like that should be in bed with him. But he started becoming controlling, he didn’t like me wearing makeup, asking me who I’m trying to look pretty for, he got mad at me when I wore short shorts than I normally wear, saying that I’m looking single. Over the past 11 months I have been extremely attentive, always trying to boost his confidence, and make him feel loved so he can work on himself and grow. We are both in the military and he ended up being sent to Maryland and I’m in California. So we decided to start dating and we fell in love almost immediately. When I first met him he talked about his past relationships and all three were pretty horrible, they were emotionally manipulative and they just tore down his confidence. So I have been dating this guy for 11 months. Learn the 4 Steps to Get What YOU Want → If you’ve really thought about it, if you feel like you lost a truly great guy, and you aren’t sure what to do next, I need you to see this. For example, if he treated you badly, chances are this isn’t a man you should pursue any longer. There are many reasons not to get your ex back.